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(My first book)
(A screenplay of mine made into a film)
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I was born on December 13, 1959 in Red Bank, New Jersey. The hospital where I emerged is located near a salty estuary, where the Atlantic Ocean merges tenuously with the fresh water of the Rumson River. Thus I was born the sight of water, and to this very day I am moved by eddies, currents, and the heavenly reek of salt air.
As an infant my curiosity frequently led me to seek answers, but lack of a working vocabulary rendered this quest futile, and forced me instead to focus my attention on developing language skills. I accomplished this sufficiently by the age of three and a half to allow me to enlist the help of others in acquiring information.
One must not be shy in asking for help when needed. As I made my way into my fifth year, I felt I was ready for anything.
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My family moved to Connecticut when I was around five, where I continued to grow and develop. It was during these formative years that I discovered the mysterious stone walls of southern New England. These curious relics of the past appear throughout the Connecticut countryside, even deep within well-grown forests. Tribute to the rockiness of the local soil, their combined length is said to rival that of the Great Wall of China. Early farmers assembled these horizontal wonders to keep out marauding frost heaves, but centuries after their construction the walls are now simply a curiosity.
At age seventeen I went to Edinboro, Pa. to attend Edinboro University of Pennsylvania. It was while at Edinboro that I met my future wife, who had also made her way to Edinboro, but from the other side of the planet. She is from Tokyo, and it was in the tundric plains of Edinboro that our paths crossed.
That was over 25 years ago, and we're still married today. We have three children, ages 18, 24, and 25. We also have a variety of pets, which I will not describe in any great detail, except to mention two, because of their somewhat humorous interaction.
We have a Chihuahua, named Chiba, who is a female with an attitude. She is also nearly deaf. Apparently Chihuahuas often have hearing problems because their auditory organs are so small. So she can hear, but not very well, and she has a real problem discerning what direction sound is coming from. You can be holding her in your lap, trying to teach her math, looking right at her, and her head will whip around as she looks to see who's talking to her from the other side of the room.
As you try to explain the significance of a hypotenuse, she gets excited about the non-existent person talking to her from across the room. This hearing deficiency causes her to be somewhat skittish, so she barks a lot, and she's really shrill. Piercing, I guess. When she barks we shoosh her loudly, so she can hear us, which leads me to our other noteworthy pet.
We have an African Grey parrot, which can mimic sounds quite well, and there's nothing wrong with his hearing. The bird always hears us shooshing the dog when it barks, so now whenever the dog barks, the bird shooshes the dog.
"Woof, woof, woof," says the Chihuahua. "Shoosh," replies the Parrot.
I live in an asylum. Something else you didn't know about me.
Back to my story.
I came to Edinboro to study Russian Language, and earned a Bachelor of Arts in Russian Language in 1985. During this time I was introduced to serious snow.
That's right. Snow. Edinboro is in the middle of a pretty heavy snow belt, and it's not unusual for us to get over 200 inches of the stuff every winter.
That's right. Two hundred.
I left Edinboro and its snow back in '90, but returned in '98, when I accepted a job as a Computer Programmer at my alma mater. What about the degree in Russian Language, you may ask?
Oh, I still have it.
And that's my life in a nutshell. I work at Edinboro University of Pa. as a Computer Programmer. I am the technical lead for a higher education software package called Banner, and spend a lot of time working with Oracle, SQL Server, Visual Basic, and a bunch of other stuff you probably don't care about.
My wife just completed her Masters in Clinical Psychology, and she and my eldest son graduated together in December 2004. My youngest son started college in September 2005. My hobby is staying out of debt, which so far I'm no good at.
I've written two books. The first is called Palm Sunday, which is a technological thriller about a stolen palm computer and the organized violation of our online privacy. If you ever sent an email and wondered how vulnerable it is after it leaves the building, then you'll love Palm Sunday. I'll put a link to that page over on the left.
My second book, Kyuboria is the focus of this website.
I've also written a screenplay, Shakespeare's Dilemma, about Shakespearean characters in a modern office setting, and co-wrote Bogo, a screenplay about sucking goo from the brainstems of identical twins.
Don't even ask.
I played the lead in both films.
Both screenplays were made into short films by Lyons Den Productions.
So there you have it. I'll add more as I get the chance, and if you send me an email with a question, I'll answer it.
Until then, farewell.
Bill Vitanyi.
Writing my name just reminded me of something. It turns out that I may have been mispronouncing my own name for my whole life. I'm still trying to work that out. More later.
Bye. |
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